The May 2010 issue of SUCCESS Magazine arrived in my mail box the other day.  If you read this blog with any regularity, you know that I am a big fan of SUCCESS.  Darren Hardy and his crew put out an amazing magazine every month.  I read it from cover to cover as soon as I get it.  This month was no exception.  As a career success coach, I urge you to subscribe to SUCCESS.  I don’t endorse a lot of products, and I have no affiliate relationship with SUCCESS.  It’s just that good.  You’re really missing out if you’re not a subscriber.

As a career success coach, I’m a big believer in the power of optimism.  I often quote The Optimist Creed on this blog.  I think it is great common sense career advice.  If you want a copy of The Optimist Creed that you can frame and hang in your office, go to http://www.budbilanich.com/optimist.

The “Legends” column in this month’s SUCCESS is about Wally Amos, founder of Famous Amos cookies.  In a sidebar, Wally Amos lists his 13 Keys to an Optimistic Attitude.  Check them out…

1. Stop being your own worst enemy.  Be your own best friend.
2. Don’t put yourself down.  Pull yourself up.
3. Don’t permit others to define who you are.  You can’t be a failure without your own consent.
4. Respect yourself.  Place a high value on yourself.
5. Take stock of who you are and what you’re capable of.  Work on weaknesses and find new strengths every day.
6. Replace “I can’t” with “I can” and “I will.”
7. Treat yourself generously, the way you want others to treat you.
8. Be compassionate. Love yourself, and others will love you.
9. Remember that you are an individual expression of God.  As a work of God’s art, you are priceless and irreplaceable.
10. Visualize what you want from life, then work toward it.  See it, then be it.
11. Allow time to be by yourself, with yourself.  Take time to appreciate yourself.
12. Enjoy your uniqueness.  Out of all the billions of people since the beginning of time, there has never been and never will be another you.
13. Realize that you are important to the entire world; what happens to the world begins with you.

No wonder Wally Amos is famous.  He gets it about life and optimism; at least from the perspective of this career success coach. 

Here’s one last quote from Wally…

“It doesn’t matter how bad things look or what appearances are.  If I can just continue on – one breath at a time – that’s all I have to do.  There’s no tomorrow.  There’s not future or no past because those are just words.  Those aren’t places you can visit.  So, if I can just keep on keeping on with enthusiasm and excitement over what I’m doing, I absolutely believe I will succeed.  And my life demonstrates that.”

In my soon to be released new book, Success Tweet: 140 Bits of Common Sense Career Success Advice All in 140 Characters or Less, I mention optimism three times…

Tweet 42: Choose optimism.  It builds your confidence.  Believe that today will be better than yesterday and that tomorrow will be better yet.

Tweet 43: Optimism is contagious.  Become a powerful, optimistic person.  Surround yourself with positive people.  They will build your confidence.

Tweet 44: Be an optimist.  Believe things will turn out well.  When they don’t, don’t sulk.  Learn what you can; use it next time.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are self confident.  Optimism is the foundation of self confidence.  Wally Amos’ 13 Keys to an Optimistic Attitude provide some great career advice.  Here are some of his words of wisdom that really resonate with me.  “Don’t put yourself down.  Pull yourself up.”  “Respect yourself.  Place a high value on yourself.”  “Visualize what you want from life, then work toward it.  See it; then be it.” “Realize that you are important to the entire world; what happens to the world begins with you.”  I really like this last piece of career advice.  It highlights the importance of the Power of 1.  The Power of 1 begins with optimism.  I believe in the Power of 1.  Wally Amos believes in the Power of 1.  What a great world it would be if everyone believed in the Power of 1.

That’s my take on Famous Amos and optimism.  What’s yours?  Please take a minute to share your thoughts with us – leave a comment.   As always, thanks for reading. 

Bud

PS – Don’t forget to get your subscription to SUCCESS Magazine.  Go to www.success.com

Confidence is one of the 4 Cs that make up my Career Success GPS System.  The other three Cs are clarity, commitment and competence.  In yesterday’s post I mentioned that I have a new book that will be out shortly.  It’s called Success Tweets: 140 Bits of Common Sense Career Success Advice Delivered in 140 Characters or Less.  This book is part of my work as a career success coach.  It’s format is just another way of explaining my thoughts on what it takes to become a career success.  Today, I’d like to share a tweet from the confidence section of Success Tweets.

Focus on what you are becoming. This helps you believe in yourself and builds your confidence. Confidence is important to your success.

I love the idea of “becoming.”  It’s really a positive concept.  And it’s similar to a couple of the ideas in The Optimist Creed.  The sixth point of The Optimist Creed says, “Forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.”  The ninth point says, “Give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others.” 

The tweet and the points in The Optimist Creed reinforce one of my career success coach points – success is a journey, not a destination.  Keep moving forward in your life and you’ll succeed.

I’m going to be 60 this year and I keep learning, growing and moving forward.  To celebrate, I will be releasing three new books.  I am becoming a better career success coach because of my writing – and my blogging and podcasting.  But I’m nothing compared to Peter Drucker.  He wrote 39 books in his long and distinguished life and career – two thirds of them were written after he was 65 years old.

“Becoming” is not a function of age.  It’s a function of your willingness to look ahead and see the opportunities.  When you focus on what you are becoming, you will also be building you self confidence.

It’s been almost 40 years since I first heard of Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of human needs.  If you’re not familiar with it, Dr. Maslow suggests that as human beings, we all have a series of needs that we strive to satisfy.  He arranged these needs in a pyramid.  According to his theory, safety is the first and most basic human need.  It is at the bottom of the pyramid.  We all strive to remain safe in an uncertain world – we all want to live another day.  Security is next.  Once we are reasonably sure that we will survive this moment and this day, our needs move to developing a sense of security, one in which we feel that our lives and quality of our lives will remain constant.  Affiliation is next.  Once we feel safe and secure, we search for meaningful relationships in our lives.  Recognition is next.  Once we feel safe, secure and valued by others, we crave recognition—in the form of praise, promotions, more money.

Self actualization is at the top of the pyramid.  Dr. Maslow says that after our safety, security, affiliation and recognition needs are satisfied, we turn our attention to what he calls “self actualization,” a state of being all that we can become.  Dr. Maslow suggests that we human beings can never be completely self actualized because as soon as we reach one goal, we realize that there is always something more that we can accomplish. 

That’s why I like the idea of “becoming” so much.  We all can always become something more, there will always be more to do, more to accomplish, a way to become more remarkable.

The common sense point here is simple.  Build your self confidence by focusing on what you are becoming.  Career success is a journey, not a destination.  Treat it that way.  Commit to taking personal responsibility for your life and career.  Set high goals; then do whatever it takes to meet or exceed them.  React positively to the setbacks, problems and negative people and events in your life.  Keep at it.  Don’t let a day when you come back empty handed in your quest for building a remarkable life and career get you down.  Get up the next day with optimism in your heart, focused on what you are becoming and keep working.

That’s my take on the importance of focusing on what you are becoming.  What’s yours?  Please take a few minutes to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

PS: If you would like a copy of The Optimist Creed to frame and hang in your office, go to http://budbilanich.com/optimist and enter your name and email address.

Happy Saint Patrick’s Day to all of my Irish friends and wannabe Irish friends today.  I’m wearing a green plaid shirt in honor of the day.  How about you?

As a career success coach I advise my clients to surround themselves with positive people if they want to achieve the career success they deserve.  I practice what I preach.  I have a strong network of friends and partners who I can call on.  I also make use of mentors.  Linda Hollander is one of my mentors.  She is teaching me how to attract corporate sponsors for one of my projects.

I was listening to a rebroadcast of one of Linda’s sponsorship training programs the other night and heard this piece of wisdom…

“They say that knowledge is power.  Knowledge is not power.  Acting on your knowledge is power.”

Linda is right.  My career success coaching clients will tell you that I am a big believer in the importance of continually building knowledge by becoming a lifelong learner.  However, learning is wasted if you don’t use what you learn. 

The US Steel pencils my dad would sometimes bring home from work used to say, “Knowing is not enough.”  When I was a kid, I was really fascinated and puzzled by these pencils. “Knowing is not enough – what the hell does that mean?” I used to think. I spent hours struggling with that idea. I was too stubborn to ask a grown-up.

When I got to Penn State, I took Philosophy 101 my freshman year. We had to read Johann von Goethe. One day, as I was plowing through an assignment, I came across this quote: “Knowing is not enough, we must do. Willing is not enough, we must apply.”

Boy was I glad I took that course! It solved one of the profound mysteries of my childhood:  “Knowing is not enough.” You have to take what you learn and use it, or what you’ve learned isn’t very valuable. That’s part of personal responsibility, using your knowledge to achieve your career success goals.

A Message to Garcia is one of the best-known writings on the idea of personal responsibility.  It is an inspirational essay written in 1899 by Elbert Hubbard that has been made into two movies, reprinted as a pamphlet and a book and translated into 37 languages.  It was well known in American popular and business culture until the middle of the twentieth century.  It was originally published as a filler without a title in the March 1899 issue of Philistine magazine.

A Message to Garcia celebrates the initiative of a soldier who was assigned and accomplished a daunting mission. “He asked no questions, made no objections, requested no help, and accomplished the mission.” The soldier was Andrew Summers Rowan, a class of 1881West Point graduate.

The essay suggests that the reader should apply Rowan’s ask no questions attitude to his or her own life as an avenue to success. Its message was often used by business leaders to motivate to their employees. It was given to every United States Sailor and Marine in both World Wars and was often memorized by schoolchildren.

It is about an event in the Spanish-American War in 1898. As the American army prepared to invade Cuba, they needed to contact the leader of the Cuban insurgents, Calixto Iniguez Garcia. Garcia had been fighting the Spanish for Cuban independence since 1868 and sought the help of the United Sates.

Here are some selected excerpts from A Message to Garcia:

“In all this Cuban business there is one man who stands out on the horizon of my memory like Mars at Perihelion. When war broke out between Spain and the United States, it was very necessary to communicate quickly with the leader of the Insurgents. Garcia was somewhere in the mountain fastnesses of Cuba – no one knew where. No mail or telegraph could reach him. The President must secure his co-operation, and quickly.

“What to do!

“Someone said to President McKinley, ‘There is a fellow by the name of Rowan who will find Garcia for you, if anybody can.’

“Rowan was sent for and given a letter to be delivered to Garcia…

“McKinley gave Rowan a letter to be delivered to Garcia; Rowan took the letter and did not ask, ‘Where is he?’

“By the Eternal! There is a man whose form should be cast in deathless bronze and the statue placed in every college of the land. It is not book-learning young men need, nor instruction about this or that, but a stiffening of the vertebrae which will cause them to be loyal to a trust, to act promptly, concentrate their energies: do the thing – ‘Carry a message to Garcia…’

A hundred years later, Nike turned these ideas into its “Just do it!” ad campaign.  At the end of my career success talks, I often tell the US Steel pencil story and challenge the audience to put to work what they have just learned.  Linda Hollander does the same thing with her message that knowledge isn’t power, using it is.  As a career success coach, I often tell the Message to Garcia story.  I tell my career success coaching clients to be like Rowan. Treat all of your tasks as “a message to Garcia.”  If you would like to have the full text of A Message to Garcia, go to http://BudBilanich.com/garcia.

The common sense point here is clear.  Successful people surround themselves with positive people.  Mentors, by definition are positive people.  They are willing to share their knowledge and wisdom to help others succeed.  Linda Hollander is one of my mentors.  Her message on the importance of using what you learn is invaluable.  Because, knowing is not enough.  You have to do.  We all have to do.  Take it from a career success coach, knowledge and learning are great.  However, knowledge and learning should never be ends in themselves.  The real career success payoff comes from applying what you’ve learned.

That’s my take on the importance of applying what you learn in your quest for career success.  What’s yours?  Please take a few minutes to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.   As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

I have a great partnership with the folks at The Walk the Talk Company.  They have published three of my books: Leading With Values; Solving Performance Problems and Your Success GPS.  Later this year, they will be releasing a new book I’ve written: Common Sense Ideas for Building a Dream Team.  I’m on their mailing list.  Yesterday, this quote from Gail McMeekin, a Walk the Talk author, showed up in my in box.

“What are your personal anchors — people, things, places, or rituals — that keep you connected to yourself, your sense of well-being, and your feelings?  What makes you feel secure in the world?  Who or what can you count on for support?  Make a list of these anchors so you can access them when you feel stranded and unsure.”

As a career success coach, I suggest surrounding yourself with positive people as a way to building your self confidence and career success.  Gail’s quote above comes from her Walk the Talk book The Power of Positive Choices.  And she’s right.  Positive people — as well as things, places and rituals – are there for you when things get a little tough or a little crazy.  Earlier this week, I did a post on the importance of having positive people in your life.

Today, I’d like to focus on the importance of positive things, places and rituals.

My home, whether it was a room in a house that I shared with eight other people when I was a student at Penn State, a 400 square foot studio apartment in Greenwich Village, or a house I owned when I was single has always been my refuge.  When I was single, my dates were always impressed with where I lived.  Most of them would say something like “This is the nicest guy’s apartment I’ve ever seen.”  That’s because I wanted my living quarters to be special, some place where I would feel comfortable and relaxed.  This wasn’t too difficult for me – as long as I had my books, my music and some art I liked on the walls, I was comfortable and relaxed.

I’ve been lucky.  Cathy and I have a very comfortable home that is decorated very nicely.  We share the same tastes, and she really has an eye.  I love being in our house.  It is warm and inviting – a very positive place.  My refuge however, is my office.  It has a wall of books, two computers and a really comfortable mission style easy chair.  I have great artwork – a couple of bicycling posters, several rugby posters, two mystery novel posters, the Optimist Creed and Paul Meyer’s career success quote hanging on the walls.  The art work reminds me of the things I love to do – bicycle, read and play rugby and think and write about career success. 

I also have a collection of name badges and lanyards from conferences where I was a speaker or facilitator hanging on the door knob.  These badges remind me of past successes.

My office is a very positive place for me.  I like being there.  I feel as if I am surrounded by things I love.  Take it from a career success coach.  It’s really easy to work hard and be productive when you’re surrounded by the things you love.  It’s a little messy – but that’s OK.  I kind of like the mess.  It makes me feel as if I am busy doing lots of interesting things.  Cathy hates the mess by the way; but that’s a different story.

Books are positive things for me.  I love books and have an extensive library; work books, novels and history.  They are a visible reminder that I have an inquisitive mind and am always learning.  I am probably going to have to weed out some of my collection to make way for new ones as the four floor to ceiling book shelves we have in our house are full, overflowing even. 

What do you love?  What are your positive things?  Cathy has a great collection of hand painted Herend figurines from Hungary.  I think everybody’s home should have some things – not necessarily expensive – that give you great joy when you look at them.

Finally, there are rituals.  Blogging is one of my biggest rituals.  No matter where I am, I begin my day by blogging.  I do this because I want to stay on top of my game as a career success coach.  My blogging ritual has helped me gain an ever deepening understanding of what it takes to become a career success.  The more I know and understand about career success, the better a career success coach I become.

The other day I traveled to New York.  I arrive at my hotel around 1:00 in the morning.  Still, I set my alarm for 6:00 so I could post my blog before I showered, dressed and went off to an 8:00 meeting.  I usually write my posts a day or two in advance, but I post every morning.  This gives me an opportunity to review and edit the post.  More important, I get a feeling of satisfaction from beginning my day by reading the positive message I’ve written and then sharing it with the world. 

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are self confident.  Self confident people surround themselves with positive people.  In The Power of Positive Choices, Gail McMeekin suggests that surrounding yourself with positive people is not enough.  She suggests that you also create a refuge for yourself, a positive place with things you love and in which you engage in rituals that help you develop more fully and put you on the road to career success.  I agree.  What is your special place?  What are your special things?  They can be as simple as my collection of name badges from conferences where I’ve spoken.  What are the rituals that add meaning to your life and provide a refuge when things get tough.  If you don’t have a special place, things or rituals in your life, take it from a career success coach and get some.  You’ll be glad you did.

That’s my take on special places, things and rituals and career success.  What’s yours?  Please take a few minutes to leave a comment sharing your special places, things and rituals with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

I’ve had a rough week.  My 85 year old dad fell and hit his head.  He didn’t realize it but he had some bleeding inside his skull.  This caused him to have more falls – especially when he was awakened in the night.  He had to have surgery to drain the blood from his skull as it was causing excessive pressure on his brain.  He is OK, but having lost my mother about a year ago, I was concerned and distracted.

When I get concerned and distracted, it is difficult for me to concentrate on my work.  When I have difficulty concentrating, I always turn to a little book I have sitting on the bookshelf on my desk.  It’s called The Portable DO IT!  I love this little book because I often find the inspiration I need to just do it.  It also helps me find the inspiration I need in my work as a career success coach.

Today I opened The Portable DO IT! to a random page and this is what I read…

117 – Keep your goals away from the trolls. 

118 – People don’t like to see others pursuing their dreams – it reminds them how far from living their dreams they are.  In talking you out of our dreams, they are talking themselves back into their comfort zone.  They will give you every rational lie they ever gave themselves.

These two pieces of advice were accompanied by a quote from the Bible, Matthew 7:6…

“Give not which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you.”

As a career success coach, I like this advice.  Self confidence is one of the four keys to success that make up my Career Success GPS System.  If you want to become self confident you need to do three things.  First, choose optimism.  Believe that today will be better than yesterday and that tomorrow will b better than today.  Second, face your fears and act.  Fear is the enemy of self confidence.  It often manifests itself as procrastination.  Self confident people are not afraid of failing.  They act.  Third, surround yourself with positive people.  Jettison the nay sayers in your life.

Surrounding yourself with positive people is the point of # 117 and # 118 in The Portable DO IT!  Unlike negative people who will tell you a million reasons why you can’t achieve something, positive people will be excited for you and your goals.  They will ask what they can do to help.  Their enthusiasm will help you when you encounter the occasional rough spot in the road.

As I write this, I’m reminded of a great passage I read in Sherman Alexie’s novel The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian.  The protagonist is a young Native American boy who leaves the reservation to attend school in an all white school district.  Check it out…

“Something magical happened to me when I went to Reardon.  Overnight I became a good player.

“I suppose it had something to do with confidence.  In Reardon my coach and the other players wanted me to be good.  They needed me to be good.  They expected me to be good.  And so, I became good.

“I wanted to live up to expectations.  I guess that’s what it comes down to.  The power of expectations.  And as they expected more of me, I expected more of myself, and it just grew and grew until I was scoring twelve points a game – as a freshman.”

The coach wanted him to guard the other team’s best player in a very important game.

“‘Coach,’ I said, ‘I don’t think I can do it.’  He walked over to me, kneeled, and pushed his forehead against mine.  Our eyes were like an inch apart.  I could smell cigarettes and chocolate on his breath.

“‘You can do it,’ Coach said.  ‘You can do it,” Coach said again.  He didn’t shout it.  He whispered it, like a prayer.  And he kept whispering again.  Until the prayer turned into a song.  And then, for some magical reason, I believed him…

“‘I can do it,’ I said to Coach, to my teammates, to the world. 

“‘You can do it,’ Coach said, ‘I can do it.’  ‘You can do it.’  ‘I can do it.’

“Do you know how amazing it is to hear that from anybody?  It’s one of the simplest sentences in the world, just four words, but they’re the four hugest words in the world when they’re put together.

“‘You can do it.’

“‘I can do it.’

“‘Let’s do it…”

As I read those words, I could see that locker room and feel the excitement – not only on Coach’s part, and the part of the young Native American, but the entire team.  We all need people like Coach in our lives.  That’s why it’s so important to surround yourself with positive people.  When you find people who believe in you and tell you “you can do it” you begin to believe in yourself.

As Sherman Alexie says, “I wanted to live up to expectations.  I guess that’s what it comes down to.  The power of expectations.  And as they expected more of me, I expected more of myself, and it just grew and grew…” 

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are self confident.  Self confident people surround themselves with positive people.  They hold the negative people in their lives at arm’s length.  They do not give things that are holy – their goals and dreams — to the dogs; nor do they cast their pearls before swine.  They share what’s holy to them with positive, supportive people.  Positive people will expect a lot of you, and from you.  These expectations will help you become a more confident person.  Take it from a career success coach.  Never underestimate the power of positive people.  They will help build your confidence and get you on the path to personal and professional success.  Befriend all the positive people you can.  Hold them close.  Treasure them and their friendship.  They will help you achieve your dreams.

That’s my take on positive people and self confidence.  What’s yours?  Please take a few minutes to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Like about a zillion other people, I went to see Alice in Wonderland in 3D over the weekend.  Tim Burton did a good job directing an enjoyable film. 

But as a career success coach, I’m always looking for messages that relate to my message on career success.  I found it near the end of the film.  If you’ve read Alice in Wonderland, you know that the White Queen tells her “Some days I believe in six impossible things before breakfast.” 

I don’t want to spoil the end of the film for you, but in this version Alice has to do battle with the Red Queen’s Jabberwocky, a very fearsome character.  As she prepares to fight the creature, she lists out loud six impossible things in which she believes.  The last is, “I will slay the Jabberwocky.”  Because this is a fairy tale and the good guys always win in fairy tales, I don’t think I’m giving anything away by telling you that she succeeds.  Alice slays the Jabberwocky – in pretty dramatic fashion.

There is a career success point here.  We all have our fears, our personal Jabberwockies – things we think we can’t do, things that scare us.   Sometimes these things scare us so much we don’t even try. 

Self confidence is one of the four keys to career success that make up my Career Success GPS System.  Self confident people share three traits in common: they are optimistic, they face their fears and act, and they surround themselves with positive people. 

In my forthcoming book Career Success GPS, I mention that fear is the enemy of self confidence.  Think of your fears as your personal Jabberwockies.  As a career success coach, I tell my clients that procrastination is the manifestation of fear.   When I find myself procrastinating, I stop and ask myself “What are you afraid of here, Bud?”

Usually, the answer is one of the 12 most common fears on the list below.  Which of these stop you from moving forward?   What are you doing about them?

1. Fear of failure – This type of fear has its roots in the misconception that everything you do has to be 100% successful.
2. Fear of success – This type of fear is based on the idea that success is likely to mean more responsibility and attention, coupled with pressure to continue to perform at a high level.
3. Fear of being judged – This type of fear comes from the need for approval that most people develop in childhood.
4. Fear of emotional pain – This type of fear is rooted in wanting to avoid potential negative consequences of your actions.
5. Fear of embarrassment – This type of fear is a result of empowering others to judge you when you demonstrate that you’re only human by making mistakes and having lapses of judgment.
6. Fear of being abandoned or being alone – This type of fear is related to rejection and low self esteem.
7. Fear of rejection – This type of fear comes from personalizing what others do and say.
8. Fear of expressing your true feelings – This type of fear holds you back from engaging in open, honest dialogue with the people in your life.
9. Fear of intimacy – This type of fear manifests itself by an unwillingness to let others get too close, less they discover the “real you.”
10. Fear of the unknown – This type of fear manifests itself as needless worry about all of the bad things that could happen if you decide to make a change in your life.
11. Fear of loss – This type of fear is related to the potential pain associated with no longer having something or someone of emotional significance to you.
12. Fear of death – The ultimate fear of the unknown.  What will happen once our spirits leave our bodies?

By identifying your fear, you are more than half way to conquering it. 

Here are my best tips for doing battle with your fears and slaying your personal Jabberwockies. 

Identify what you fear.  Figure out why you’re afraid. Is it fear of failure?  Is it fear of making the wrong decision?  Is it fear of a lost opportunity?  Are you afraid that you aren’t up to task?  Once you identify the reason behind your fear, you are well on the way to overcoming it.

Admit your fears.  It’s OK to be afraid. You wouldn’t be human if you were never afraid. A common definition of courage is the ability to feel fear and still do what you need to do regardless. In 1988, I faced a very frightening decision. Should I stay in a comfortable but ultimately unsatisfying job with a large corporation, or should I start my own business?  I was afraid of failing. Failing meant that I would lose my savings and have to start over again, looking for a job in another corporation. However, once I identified and admitted my fear, I was able to take the next step – acceptance.

Accept your fears.  Accepting your fears is important, because it shows that you know you’re human. Once I accepted that I was afraid of failing, I was able to start my business and succeed. In fact, I embraced my fear of failure. It made me work harder; it pushed me to work the long hours and learn the entrepreneurship lessons necessary to be successful as a self employed coach, consultant and speaker.

Take action. Action cures fear.  It is the most important of these four steps. Do something! The worst thing that can happen is that you’ll find it was the wrong thing to do – and you will have eliminated at least one thing from your list of possible actions.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are self confident.  Self confident people face their fears and act.  Action is the antidote to fear.   In the newly released 3D version of Alice in Wonderland, Alice was afraid, but she picked up her sword and did battle with the fearsome Jabberwocky.  You need to do the same.  In most cases, just like Alice you’ll succeed and your fears won’t be realized. In the cases where things don’t work out, you’ll find that failure isn’t as catastrophic as you imagined. Successful people learn from their failures. Take it from a career success coach, by taking action on your fears, by doing battle with your personal Jabberwocky’s, you win on both counts. You win if you make good decisions and things work out. You even win if you make a bad decision and things go poorly, because you have an opportunity to learn from your actions and the subsequent problems you faced.

That’s my take on Alice in Wonderland and facing your fears.  What’s yours?  Please take a moment to leave a comment sharing your thoughts.  As always, thanks for reading.  And, keep slaying those Jabberwockies.

Bud

If you read this blog with any regularity, you probably know that I am a rugby football enthusiast.  I think it is a great sport.  I played for over 30 years.  I learned a lot about life on the rugby pitch.  I think I am a better career success coach as a result of my participation in rugby.  In my retirement, I support youth rugby. 

The other day, I got a note from Bill Baer, a friend and coach of the Denver East High School Rugby Club, the reigning Colorado High Schools Rugby State Champions.  Since rugby is a club sport, it is funded by the players, their parents and coaches and donations from supporters.  I sent them a check to help fund this Spring’s season.

In his request for funds, Bill included the following…

You may not know much about rugby, but you know the value of courage, respect, honesty, commitment, team and hard work.  You know how important positive peer pressure and good role models are to teenagers.  You may not have thought of rugby as a means to building character in teenaged boys, but that is what East High Boys Rugby is all about.  Our club teaches rugby as a metaphor for life where courage, respect, honesty, commitment, team and hard work make the difference.

That’s a mouthful, and something worth repeating.  As a career success coach, I’m often asked, “Bud what does it take to succeed in my life and career?”  My answer is simple.  You have to do four things:

• Clarify your purpose and direction in your life.
• Commit to taking personal responsibility for your success.
• Build unshakeable self confidence.
• Get competent in four areas: creating positive personal impact, outstanding performance, communication skills and relationship building.

Bill Baer is giving the young men of the Denver East High School Rugby Club lessons in self confidence.  His lessons involve “courage, respect, honesty, commitment, team and hard work.”  Bill and I have much the same message; me to my career success coaching clients, Bill to his young rugby players.

Bill is a great mentor to these young men.  He helps build the self confidence they will need to succeed in their lives and careers. 

I believe that you need to do three things to build your self confidence.   First, choose optimism, believe that today will be better than yesterday and that tomorrow will be better than today.  Second, face your fears and act.  Third, surround yourself with positive people. 

To my way of thinking, mentors are very positive people because they are willing to give of themselves to help others succeed.  That’s what Bill Baer is doing for the young men of the Denver East High School Rugby Club.  His alumni are playing in colleges all over the country.  He mentioned to me that two Denver East alums played against one another in a recent Syracuse vs. Harvard match.

Here’s what to look for in a mentor.  A good mentor…

M   Motivates you to accomplish more than you think you can.

E    Expects the best from you.

N   Never gives up on you or lets you give up on yourself.

T   Tells you the truth – even when it hurts.

O   Occasionally kicks your butt.

R   Really cares about you and your success.

That’s what Bill Baer is for the Denver East High School Rugby Club.  He teaches young men how to play a wonderful, fun game.  More important, he teaches them courage, respect, honesty, commitment, team and hard work.  You go, Bill.  As we say on the rugby pitch, I’m “with you.”

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are self confident.  Self confident people are optimistic.  They face their fears and act.  And they surround themselves with positive people.  Mentors, by definition, are positive people.  Take it from this career success coach, if you don’t have a mentor, find one.  He or she can help guide you through the ups and downs you will encounter on your way to career success.  And, don’t forget it’s never too early to become a mentor yourself.  Pay it forward by sharing the life lessons you’ve learned with others who need and want the knowledge and wisdom you have gathered in your life.  My friend Bill Baer mentors lots of young men in his role as the Denver East High School Rugby Club Coach.  He teaches them courage, respect, honesty, commitment, team and hard work – important life lessons and the kinds of characteristics that lead to career success.

That’s my take on Denver East High Rugby, self confidence, character and success.  What’s yours?   Please take a few minutes to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

As a career success coach, I’m always looking for new and different ways to get across my common sense ideas on career success.  On Friday I had a great opportunity.  I was invited to see the Go For It! Institute’s program in action at a K through 8 school in Denver.  If you don’t know about the Go For It! Institute, you should.  The Institute teaches kids the value of things like positive attitude, believing in themselves, positive habits, goal setting and persistence. 

Their work is based on ideas created by Judy Zerofa.  Judy has created seven keys to success for young students.  Check them out…

KEY 1: I Have a Positive Attitude! Learn what attitude is; what aspects of your life are controlled or directed by your attitude; how to determine your attitude at any given moment; specific strategies to make a positive attitude a permanent habit in your life.

KEY 2: I Believe in Myself! Understand the nature of human potential through a simple process of identifying your personal talents and abilities; developing academic strengths and personal interests to create personal fulfillment and economic opportunities for your future.

KEY 3: I Build Positive Habits! Understand the process of how habits are created; learn to identify and remove self-defeating habits; create habits that will make all aspects of your life easier and more successful.

KEY 4: I Make Wise Choices! Learn the dramatic relationship between any current circumstances in your life and the choices that created these; develop a personal proactive plan for desired outcomes through conscious, wise choices.

KEY 5: I Set and Achieve Goals! Recognize the difference between a wish and a goal; make a commitment, plan and take action; recognize completion.

KEY 6: I Use My Creative Imagination! Learn to adapt a technique professional athletes use to extend their physical ability, to accelerate problem solving and goal achievement in all areas of your life.

KEY 7: I Am Persistent! Track progress; develop the focus and determination required to succeed; create an attitude of gratitude as the access to fulfilling your dreams, link the Seven Keys to Success together in everyday life.

The Go For It! Institute is in business to bring these keys to young people and their parents, but as a career success coach, I think they are important ideas for anyone interested in creating a successful life and career.  Their Seven Keys to Success bare a remarkable similarity to two of my four keys for career success; commitment to taking personal responsibility for your life and career and self confidence.

In case you’re a new reader of this blog, I call my four keys for career success, the “4Cs: clarity, commitment, confidence and competence.”  Here they are in a little more detail…

• Clarity of purpose and direction
• A sincere commitment to taking personal responsibility for your life and career
• Unshakeable self confidence
• Competence in four key areas: Creating positive personal impact;  Outstanding performance; Dynamic communication; Relationship building

On Friday, I watched a class of fourth graders work with the Seven Keys to Success.  It was great to see these little guys and gals put their own spin on things like having a positive attitude.   I wish I had someone work with me on these principles when I was that young. 

Judy Zerofa developed these success keys after interviewing 35 Horatio Alger Award winners.  I think they are a brilliantly simple success formula.  She is taking her positive message to kids and parents in an attempt at starting the success cycle early in life.  Check out the Go For It! Institute’s website at www.goforitfoundation.com.  Get involved, make a donation if you can.

The common sense point here is simple.  As a career success coach, I am always reminding my clients that successful people commit to taking personal responsibility for their lives and careers and they are self confident.  The Go For It! Institute’s Seven Keys to Success are all about taking personal responsibility and self confidence.   Think about it.  You will succeed if you have a positive attitude, believe in yourself, build positive habits, make wise choices, set and achieve goals, use your imagination and persist.  It’s only common sense.  I’m glad I was introduced to the Go For It! Institute and the great work they are doing with kids.  I think their message applies to all of us.  If you incorporate these seven keys into your life, you’ll be well on your way to creating the successful life and career you want and deserve.

That’s my take on the Go For It! Institute and the great work they are doing with kids.  What’s yours?  Please take a minute to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Self confidence is one of the four pillars of career and life success in my Common Sense Success System.  I discuss it in detail in several of my books: Straight Talk for Success; Star Power; I Want You…To Succeed, Your Success GPS and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success.  If you want to become interpersonally competent, you need to do three things: 1) become an optimist; 2) face your fears and act; 3) Surround yourself with positive people.

A while back in a post I did on optimism and self confidence, I mentioned a quote in which a guy by the name of Ambrose Bierce bashed optimism.  “The doctrine that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly, everything good, especially the bad, and everything right that is wrong… It is hereditary, but fortunately not contagious.”

The other day, I came across another quote from Mr. Bierce, “Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.”  I found these quote to be really cynical, so I decided to learn something about Ambrose Bierce.  As it turns out, he was called “Bitter Bierce” by his contemporaries.  And I can see why.  First he bashes optimism, then he suggests that human beings see the good fortune of others as a personal calamity. 

Ambrose Bierce is an interesting character.  He was born in 1842, and served in the Union Army during the Civil War.  No one knows for sure, but it is thought that he died in 1914.  In 1913, he traveled to Mexico to observe firsthand the revolution going on there. 

He joined Pancho Villa’s army in Juarez.  On December 26 1913, he posted a letter to a friend from the city of Chihuahua.  That was his last correspondence.  Wikipedia says, “Several writers have speculated that he headed north to the Grand Canyon, found a remote spot there and shot himself, though no evidence exists to support this view. All investigations into his fate have proved fruitless, and despite an abundance of theories his end remains shrouded in mystery. The date of his death is generally cited as ‘1914?’”.  His disappearance is one of the most famous in American literary history.

In 1906 he published “The Cynic’s Word Book”, later to become known as “The Devil’s Dictionary”.   It is a book of satirical definitions of English words.  Ambrose was clever, I’ll give him that.  I often see quotes from this book online, including the one that inspired today’s post, “Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.”

But I digress.  I wish he were around today, because I would like to ask him where he got his bleak view of human nature.  He defines politeness as, “The most acceptable hypocrisy.”  In another quote, he defines perseverance as, “A lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.”

Do you know any people like Ambrose Bierce?  If you do, hold them at arm’s length.  While you may find them to be witty and entertaining at first, they will drag you down in the long run.

People like Ambrose Bierce may be clever, but their views are incompatible with becoming self confident.  Self confident people look for, and usually find, the best in others.  They are polite because it is the best way to build strong relationships.  They are willing to extend themselves to help others, even when they can see no immediate return to them for so doing.

If you read this blog regularly, you know I am a big fan of The Optimist Creed.  Point 6 says,

“Promise yourself to be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are of your own.”

This is 180 degrees from the Ambrose Bierce quote that I cited at the beginning of this post and from his life view in general.  Self confident, optimistic people aren’t jealous or upset by the success of others.  They are genuinely pleased when they see others succeed.  They use others’ success as an inspiration.  They use it to motivate themselves to achieve bigger and better successes.

If you would like a copy of The Optimist Creed that you can frame and hang in your workspace, go to http://budbilanich.com/optimist.

The common sense point here is clear.  Successful people are self confident and interpersonally competent.  Self confident and interpersonally competent people build strong relationships with the people around them.  In part, they build these relationships by being genuinely pleased about the success of others.  They are not jealous, nor petty.  They are happy to see others succeed.  Self confident and interpersonally competent people use the success of others to motivate themselves to greater success.

That’s my take on Ambrose Bierce, self confidence and interpersonal competence and how one reacts to the success of others.  What’s yours?  Please leave a quote sharing your thoughts on these ideas.  As always, thanks for reading – and writing.

Bud

Self confidence is one of the keys to personal and professional success that is part of my Common Sense Success System.  I discuss it in several of my books: Straight Talk for Success, Star Power, I want YOU…To Succeed, Your Success GPS and 42 Rules to Jumpstart your Professional Success. 

You can become self confident by doing three things.  First, choose optimism.  Believe in your heart of hearts that today will be better than yesterday, and that tomorrow will be better than today.  Second, face your fears and act.  Procrastination and inaction feed fear and rob you of self confidence.  Action cures fear.  Third, surround yourself with positive people.  Don’t let the naysayers into your life.  Hang around with people who are positive about themselves, their careers and life in general.

I have learned that self confidence is an upward spiral.  Self confidence leads to professional success, which in turn leads to increased self confidence, which leads to higher levels of success, and so on.

You might be saying, “That’s great, but how do I become self confident if I’m new in my job or career and haven’t had a lot of success to bolster my self confidence?”  There’s an old saying that applies here: “Fake it till you make it.” In other words, act as if you’re successful. This will help you succeed. Your success will help you build your self confidence.

How, do you “fake it, will you make it?”  Begin with affirmations. If you’re in a new job, tell yourself something like, “I have the skills and desire to succeed in this job,” several times a day. If you repeat this to yourself often enough, you will begin to believe it. This will help you perform at the level necessary in order to actually succeed in your job.

Affirmations are positive self talk. The idea behind affirmations is that when you think of the things to which you aspire, like becoming a success, and then tell yourself that you are a professional success, you will believe that you can become successful. More importantly, you will be more likely to do the work it takes to make that aspiration come true.

A couple of years ago, I wrote a book called Star Power, Common Sense ideas for Career and Life Success. I used a star to depict this model. I urged readers to think of themselves as a star and to aspire to becoming a career and life star. I like the star metaphor. Daily, I repeat the following affirmation to myself: “Bud Bilanich is a star.”

I’ve done a lot of working in making this affirmation a reality – redoing my website, developing better promotional materials, speaking, writing books, blogging.

I’ve also done something a little unusual. A few years ago, right after Star Power was published, I went to the “Name a Star” website and named a star after myself. Now I can say “Bud Bilanich is a star” and really believe it, because Bud Bilanich really is a star.

Bud Bilanich the star, is Catalog Number TYC  868-1011-1 in the constellation Leo. Bud Bilanich has a Visual Magnitude indicator of 11.2. Right Ascension is 11h 58m 21s. Declination is 11degrees, 43,’18.”

I don’t have a clue what all of these things mean, except the constellation Leo, which I chose because my birthday is August 14. But I do know one thing. Bud Bilanich is a star!

How’s that for an affirmation?

Affirmations work. I have become a minor star in the career and life success world.  You don’t need to go to the lengths I did to make them work either. Just decide what you want, visualize yourself as having it, and tell yourself you have it. Then do whatever it takes to make your affirmation come true.

Affirmations alone, however, are not enough to guarantee your professional success. You have to do the work. Spend the time necessary to accomplish your goals. Volunteer for projects that will get you noticed. Become an expert on your company, its competitors, and your industry. In other words, bust your butt, and you will succeed.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are self confident.  If you want to become self confident, you need to become an optimist, face your fears and act and hang around with self confident people.  Your self confidence will improve as you build a successful life and career. The self confidence => success =>self confidence cycle is an upward spiral. You have to enter the cycle somewhere. Most of us don’t have a strong track record as we begin our careers, move into a new job, or start a business. Therefore, you have to “fake it till you make it” by “acting as if” you are a success.  Find ways to bolster your self confidence until you have some real successes on which you can build.  Affirmations are a great tool for helping you “fake it till you make it.”

That’s my take on self confidence and faking it till you make it.  What’s yours?  Please take a few minutes to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud